Thread at Happy Bachelors
Hello I'm Winston Wu, founder of HappierAbroad.com.
For many years I was dateless and lonely in America. Meeting, dating and making love to beautiful women was my top desire and highest fantasy, which consumed me everyday. Yet I was frustrated because I seemed to be completely shut out of the dating game. Every girl I met told me, either directly or indirectly, that I wasn't her type.
Yet we were under this mass belief that getting dates was easy, that girls were friendly in America, so if you couldn't get dates, then you had to look at yourself for the problem. So like everyone else, I was programmed to look toward myself to figure out what I could change or improve in myself to get results.
Yet I saw nothing wrong with me. I liked myself and saw a lot of great qualities in me. And I didn't feel that it would be right or natural to try to be something I'm not just to please others (not that I could anyway). I didn't understand why I couldn't just be myself and get the results I wanted, since after all, our culture and media gave the impression it was easy to get dates in America, as long as you were cool, confident and likable. If you can't, then there's something wrong with you. That's what we assume.
Anyhow, I couldn't see anything wrong with me, yet I was programmed to think that there was because I couldn't get any dates no matter how hard I tried. This resulted in a perpetual loop where I would look to myself for the problem, but finding nothing wrong, I went out and tried to get dates only to fail again and look back toward myself, which repeated the cycle ad nauseum.
Being at a loss, I turned to others for answers. I asked what friends I had for advice, and also acquaintances, teachers, counselors, therapists, parents, even pastors. None of them had any real solutions. All they could do was one of the following:
1) Tell me to work out and dress better, or get involved in some activities and clubs. I did all that but I was still treated like I was not even in the dating game. There are things you can join to meet women, but if you're not their type or they're not available, the best you're going to get is casual polite chit chat from them.
2) Tell me not to worry about it and focus on other things in life, such as getting a career or focusing on other hobbies. That might work for a little while, but not forever, since beautiful women were my highest desire.
3) Tell me to lower my standards. As if they weren't already low enough, I mean come on now. Get real. What am I supposed to do, go for the rock bottom? I can't force myself to want something I don't want. And I'm not that unattractive either, so why can't I even get average looking girls who are on my level? It seems that even average girls in America think they deserve the very best in men - the prince charming with looks, money, personality and status.
4) Give me the typical cliche "Don't worry, you'll meet the right person someday." Yet I was not necessarily looking for the "right person", I just wanted some decent dates, which was supposed to be easy, according to our culture, TV shows and sitcoms. So why should I have to wait years or never for one "right person" just to get a normal date?!
5) Tell me to stop trying so hard and just let things come naturally, since you usually find love when you're not looking. Yet when I stopped trying, I still got NO results! Nothing. Same thing.
6) Tell me to stop being negative, needy or desperate, which is a turn off for girls, and that if you like yourself, then you will become more attractive and others will like you too. Yet I DID LIKE myself... a lot! That's why I felt I deserved to get dates and girls, and why I wouldn't give up. I felt confident and attractive around girls too. Yet that didn't matter cause the girls didn't like to be approached, didn't want to meet me, and didn't think I was their type. My confidence and self-esteem didn't change that. That was the reality. This cliche was fantasy/fiction. I was sure that being negative, needy or desperate was not the cause of my rejection, for those traits followed after my failures, not before them. This was just a cheap attempt at pinning the blame on me. After all, you can't blame a hungry man if he hasn't eaten.
7) Preach that if I got a good steady job or career and became successful and stable, that girls would take me seriously and flock to settle down with me and raise a family. This kind of advice usually comes from older people who are more old fashioned - like your parents. Yet I have had high paying jobs before, and when I told girls about them, it didn't create any attraction. They would just say "That's nice". This kind of advice was outdated and geared toward marriage, which I wasn't looking for. I just wanted normal dates, romance and to have good times with hot girls and to be "in the game". TV shows and sitcoms said it was easy and natural, so why wasn't it?!
So, being at a dead end, I turned to these so called "Dating Gurus" for help. These folks had marketed themselves and their books/seminars to guys like me, who wanted to get hot girls but were at a dead end. They made big promises and claims, offering techniques that could make any guy into a smooth pick up artist and ladies' man.
I was never stupid enough to sign up for their expensive seminars and boot camps of course, since I was skeptical and frugal with my money. But I read many of their books, articles and websites. When I tried to implement their techniques, all I got were laughs. The whole thing felt so fake and unnatural. They seemed to only work in the PUA guru's fictitious promo stories, not in real life. Eventually I realized that such techniques and tricks only worked if the girl was ALREADY attracted to you, not if she wasn't. But that was the problem - I could not find anyone attracted to me in the first place, so these techniques were a moot point, since they can't do anything about the root problem. You can't create attraction where there is none. So I was back at square one again.
Dumbfounded, I turned to women themselves for the answers. I asked every female friend and acquaintance I could find for what I could do to turn my dating life around. Yet they could offer nothing but the same cliched answers above. So when I asked them "Well why am I not dating material to YOU then? What am I lacking?", all they could say was "Cause I like you as a friend".
So again I was left with no solutions and no way to get what I wanted. Yet our programmed society and culture continued to tell me to look at myself to see what I could change or improve. When I did that, I could find nothing to improve that would get any real results, and neither could anyone else. I was still not anyone's type and no one was interested in me.
Worst of all, even trying to get dates felt like the most unnatural and awkward thing in the world, as though I were going against the grain or stepping outside of bounds. This was weird cause all the TV shows and sitcoms I saw portrayed dating as easy and natural in America, as well as fun. That was what I believed too, yet I could not reconcile my belief with reality.
Frustrated beyond words, and in a state of inner torture with billions of unfulfilled fantasies, I began looking for desperate measures. I used prayer, cast love spells, used witchcraft, constructed Egyptian love charms that I learned of from books, etc. Anything to get results. But none of that really worked, and even trying them spooked me out.
The futility continued. No matter what I did, it was always a zero sum game. It seemed that I just wasn't meant for what I wanted most.
One day, I finally found my answer, one that most would never consider. It would be the REAL and PERMANENT SOLUTION to my dilemma, one that WORKED naturally and got real RESULTS.
And that's what I'm here to share with you - for FREE. There's no book of secrets to buy from me, no secret tricks or techniques you have to learn and pay for, none of that BS. My solution consists of only TWO SHORT WORDS, two measly little words! The rest flows naturally and easily from them. Yet they were two words that were outside of most people's "mental prism of reality" and that's why in most minds they are not even considered.
But they work, not just for a lucky few, but for ANY average decent guy. That's the bottom line. And I'm here to show you why, how, and to prove it to you. Unlike others, everything I say is backed by verifiable proof. I do not ask you to take my claims on faith, like con artists who want your money do, nor would I want you to.
And the two simple words are:
That's it! Those two words transformed my hopeless no-win situation into one of everlasting abundance, skyrocketing my dating life from zero to infinity! See it for yourself in my Photo Collage, Slide Shows and Film. The evidence is in plain sight.
Foreign Female Encounters Film
I couldn't believe it and still can't. The solution was so simple the whole time. The reason I didn't know about it earlier was that it was so outside of everyone's "mental prism of reality" that no one could ever think of suggesting it. You see, when something is too far outside the box, to most people it doesn't exist. We are all conditioned to think that if we have any problem of a social or psychological nature, that we should stay put and make changes in ourselves, for the problem is always with you, not with others. That's how we are trained to solve personal and social problems. This includes your typical peers, parents, teachers, therapists, counselors, pastors, media, etc. They all think inside the box and can only seek solutions within their programmed reality matrix.
As such, we assume that location makes no difference and that people are the same everywhere. But nothing could be more wrong, and that's what I'm here to share and prove to you.
Location makes ALL the difference, contrary to the teaching of pop New Age psychologists and self-help gurus that it's all about your thoughts and attitude. Have a look at these testimonials I put together from others that concur with this claim.
The concept of Global Dating is simple. You go where you are wanted and where what you want is in the greatest abundance. That's how and why it works so naturally. For more explanations and examples, see:
Also see my Expat Advisor's spiel on why Global Dating is the sensible answer here: http://www.happierabroad.com/Ladislav.php
Since most dateless guys never hear about this overseas solution, which has changed the lives of many I know, I believe they should be aware of it, at least as a viable option. So that's my objective, to disseminate this overseas solution to those who need it, which can transform their lives beyond their wildest expectations. That is my Mission and Gospel. And Happier Abroad is the vehicle to help spread this awareness.
You see, the reality is that though some guys do get dates and attractive women in America, there is a large percentage of them that are like me, completely shut out of the dating game altogether and can't do anything about it. They are in a futile situation and afraid to admit it lest they be perceived as losers. This is a definitely reality. Yet it is one that is not given any attention, for our culture holds that only two things really matter - working and consuming. The rest are trivial and not that important. Yet that is not true.
There are expats out there of course, that know of this dating abroad lifestyle and are living it themselves. But they tend to be low key and prefer to avoid attention. So they keep their lives private and do not like to be involved in promoting controversial topics. And they are too busy enjoying their life to bother looking back anyway. Plus they have to be careful not to too open about it, for they know that these are taboo areas that carry negative connotations, which can even be construed as unpatriotic. Also, most people are not that outspoken when it comes to the truth.
That's why I'm one of the few that promote this solution for datelessness in America, and the only one that's started a major website and movement about it.
I KNOW that it works reliably and consistently for ANY average decent guy, not just a special few. And it works easily and naturally too. Once you're in the right location, you simply go with the flow and go for what you want. Then the results come. That's it.
I know this from firsthand experience and that of many others I know. I've always believed that the truth speaks for itself, and the "truth" all over my website speaks for itself.
Now you might be wondering why if this solution is so simple and real, why most don't know about it still. And that's a good question. I can think of multiple reasons:
1) This is a taboo topic and most fear that drawing attention to their datelessness makes them look like a loser and whiner. So they deny it and pretend that everything is hunky and dory, a facade which is expected of them.
2) People are conditioned to believe that if they have a social problem, they need to blame or improve themselves rather than their society or culture. They also assume that they have no choice but to stay put and try to solve it. Since the problem is with them, location would makes no difference, they believe, because it is assumed that people are the same everywhere. Therefore, they presume that anyone who can't get dates in a particular community will have the same problem everywhere they go, since the problem can only be with them. According to this myth, a person who can get dates can get them anywhere and a person who can't, won't get them anywhere. This is a HUGE fallacy that I know for a 100 percent certainty is FALSE. All the concrete evidence on my site disproves this fallacy.
3) It is politically incorrect and offensive to publicly claim that something in another country is better than your own, even if it's true, especially if it pertains to dating and women, and particularly if you are part of the media. That's not what people want to hear, nor is it in the corporate or government interest to spread such facts. Instead, there is a propensity in society and the media to ridicule anything outside the box, even if it's true.
4) There are many expats having better love lives and relationships abroad, as mentioned earlier, but you don't hear about them cause they mostly keep their lives private and do not like to be in the spotlight. So their opinions do not get heard by many. And plus the media does not consider this kind of thing newsworthy, for the reasons listed above, so they don't cover it.
5) There is so much information out there about so many things, that even the news media have to be very selective about what to publicize. Generally, the mainstream media prefers to focus on economic issues, bad news and celebrity lives. So a lot of important and relevant information out there does not get public attention and does not spread effectively to the mass populace of the world. Most information is relegated only within certain circles. But with the advent of the internet, all that has changed and it is now easier than ever to find out about anything that you want online, as long as you are looking for it. Thus the internet remains the greatest hope and vehicle for spreading this movement.
But nevertheless, the truth is the truth, regardless of what any dysfunctional society says.
Going abroad for more and better dates is not hard at all in practice or concept. The only hard part is opening your mind to accepting realities beyond your paradigm and programming, and in believing that they are real, and integrating that into your life. For that you may need a little convincing, inspiration, guidance, and proof of course. That's where we come in. Me and my Advisors, and the content at Happier Abroad, are here to provide all that.
With more and better quality dates will come other perks and benefits as well. You will feel more valued, desired and wanted, which will boost your self-esteem to healthier levels. And you will feel the appreciation that you deserve. As a result, your attitude, outlook and mental health will be greatly improved. You will have a better feeling of social connectedness too, which humans need deep down. Over time, you will also become more culturally enriched, having lived in different cultures, which will expand your world view with extra dimensions, and widening your "mental prism of reality" so to speak. And of course, depending on which country you live in, your cost of living may be substantially lower too, which increases the purchasing power of your money.
So you see, the overseas solution is simple, easy, natural and WORKS for ANY decent good guy. It merely requires you to break out of your "mental prism" to take seriously.
So there's the answer. I've given it to you for FREE already.
Thank you for reading and allowing me to share.