Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Why Men's Groups Fail

I just finished reading Dr. Helen's book Men on Strike which overall is a very well written book. Over the next few days I will work on putting together a book review and hopefully it will be ready to be posted by the weekend.

However, I will say that as a Man Going my Own Way I do see things a little bit differently than what she wrote as her 6 tips in the final chapter.

Which means in my review at the end I will need break down 2 big important issues. One would be the two options society gives to the majority of men.

The other is why Men's Groups are utter failures. While I think Dr. Helen Smith means well I'm not sure how much she understands the history of Why Men's Groups Fail.

I remember back in 2007 Irlandes from the Don't Get Married wrote a very good post on Why Men's Group's Fail.

I did a google search to see if it could be located and I did find in in the Best of Happy Bachelors and I did find under the thread Words of Wisdom from Irlandes but was not separated from the other 31 posts.

Therefore I decided to copy and paste it here so it could be seen all by itself, while your at it, I also high recommend reading the thread it's your problem NOT ours by Irlandes as well.

With said here is the post Irlandes wrote called Why Men's Groups Fail! Enjoy!

Why MRA/FR Groups Fail

Married said he believed an MRA organization could be made to work. A lot of people over the last 40 years have agreed with this statement. None of them actually accomplished anything of importance, but they started out with the belief they could. The best of them got some publicity, and from time to time made changes affecting a man or two, but the feminist steam-roller never so much as slowed.

How well I know. Been there; done that.

I was active as an individual from 1978 until 1993, and from 1984 till 1993 I supplied no-fee counseling services from my home to divorced and unwed fathers, my Real Daughter did a statistical sampling when she was in the University and estimated I must have worked with over 1,600 men, and a very few non-custodial women (since their problems are virtually identical.) From 1984 till 1987, when a stupid, ignorant bas tard broke it up because we didn't do things his way, I was both counselor and spokesman for the board of directors of a Father's Rights group. I also read a lot, and studied other groups to see why no one could get any serious participation.

The reason I like the marriage strike and this message board is because it doesn't matter if we men agree on things. As long as the general trend is a collapse of marriage, and that is indeed the current trend, the feminists are guaranteed to lose, the only question is what language we will be speaking next and how many will be killed when this nation is destroyed. I like to fantasize that we can fix the nation, cast out the vicious man-haters, restore the family as the building block of our society, and return to the Constitution, but I realize that is not rational to think so.

Here, I am going to write some of the basics that I learned about MRA groups and why they have always failed, and why they will always fail, no matter how brilliant and dedicated the men involved may be. Hint: they always die from internal illnesses.

[I]. A REFUSAL TO STUDY HISTORY. Very few men who found MRA/FR groups bother to talk to those who came before. The argument goes like this: "I don't want to talk to you. You accomplished nothing, so you are a loser. I can learn nothing from a loser like you." Yes, at times, they use that sort of language.

Already at this stage, they are 100% guaranteed to fail. They not only have to re-invent the wheel. They have to first learn how to walk; discover the cave as a residence; discover clothes and fire; and find a supply of food before they can even think of something advanced like the wheel. Every step of the way, it is fight, bicker, and quarrel, and they are merely relearning the most basic elements of what has been tried dozens of times before. Most groups never reach the wheel stage.

There is no time for this. For forty years, the average MRA/FR organization has only lasted an estimated 18 months before some know-it-all, who almost never does anything personally, breaks it up.

And, of course, the founders do not always avoid terminal mistakes at the most basic level.

This is usually a subset of "I am special and different. Everyone else is a loser, so of course they failed. Since I am special and different, I will succeed where the losers all failed."

[II]. LETTING WOMEN HELP. Here, on, it doesn't matter, since we don't have to actually do anything as a group except help Lee keep his Internet service working. The function here is simply to convince men that marrying AW on a business-as-usual basis has a high probability of destroying their lives, and making their children's lives equally miserable. There is room here for those who want to find and marry the extremely rare Lydia; live as a solitary bachelor; bring in a FW; move to a foreign country; or become a sex tourist. Every single AW who doesn't obtain a wage slave to kick around and divorce is another victory for all men. Even if they manage to take away Lee's services forever, he has already created an excellent cadre to carry on the work underground.

In an MRA/FR group with real goals, female participation is the kiss of death. This is not intuitive, but it is reality. I am going to tell what happened in our FR group, but I contacted other groups to see how things went with them. Most of those in groups that accomplished NOTHING proudly said they had women helping, and they also sadly admitted they had a constant number of suicides among members. Our suicides dropped to zero once we ousted the women.

[a]. The women, mostly second wives or girl friends, who attended meetings, demanded half of the group's work be to help women, in the name of equality. Women already have the Army; Air Force; Navy; Marines; National Guard; State Highway Patrol; State Bureau of Investigation; Sherriff; City Police; DHS; the local DV center; and the entire Federal and State Budgets at their fingertips. Men have nothing except imputed payments for this and that and threats of jail if they can't pay. Our annual budget was probably around $200. Yet, these fiends insisted we had to be 'fair'.

[b]. They demanded we not allow men to whine; men are "supposed to act like men." See suicide info above. After we (okay, I, under authorization of the State President) got rid of the women, our meetings emphasized counseling techniques and suicides dropped to zero.

[c]. The minute anyone attempted to enforce group bylaws, which generally meant telling an obstreperous woman to sit down and shut up, other men would do a great imitation of Don Quixote and rush to the attack against the vile brute who actually dared to seek justice for MEN. (For those unfamiliar with classic Spanish literature, Quixote was a senile, doddering old fool on a knightly crusade in his private world of dementia, and could not tell the difference between a windmill and the enemy, nor between a horrid female fiend and a woman of flawless purity.)

[III}. MEN ARE INCAPABLE OF COOPERATING TO STAND UP TO WOMEN. This is the ultimate reason MRA/FR groups are inevitably doomed to fail. Men simply cannot organize to stand up to women. Not now; not in the Greek Empire; not in the Roman Empire; not ever.

No, I am not contradicting my statement that in Mexico men cooperate to keep women under control. Men can do that. But when women once take control of the entire system and raise a generation of children, men can't get it back. It it were possible, we would still be speaking Ancient Latin or Greek.